Pillars of Character1. Trustworthiness

Trust is built when you stay true to your word repeatedly. Trustworthy people are afforded more opportunities, as they are reliable.

It is often easier to tell a white lie than to tell the truth, however if you are found out it could damage the trust element in your relationship with the affected person.

Loyalty is a form of trustworthiness and sometimes it may demand that you give up some of your time, resources and opportunities.

You should be loyal / trustworthy:

• To your family
• To your friends
• At school
• When someone confides in you
• In looking after the interests of those you care about
• When someone breaks the rules

Trustworthiness also involves being yourself and not pretending that you are someone you are not. In other words, you should not inflate your own achievements or pretend you like certain things to impress someone else.

If you pay attention to news and media, you should be aware of corruption and crime in South Africa. You will also hear grown-ups talk about corrupt members of Parliament that do business underhandedly, which means that they are dishonest. I see dishonest people in business daily and I must tell you, it is very disheartening.

Corrupt people rob innocent people of what is rightfully theirs and dishonest people in business usually make false promises and do not keep their word. Besides the effect this horrible trait has on other people, it causes people like you and I to lose our trust in them and choose not to do business with them, which harms our livelihood.

You are very likely to encounter dishonest friends along the way and they may want to involve you in their dishonesty. This could be a difficult situation, as you need to be honest as well as loyal to your friend – how do you do that?

This brings to mind the time when my family went to visit my friend’s house. I was about 5 years old. My friend’s mother gave us a snack. I was content, remembering my mom’s teachings on etiquette; “do not ask for more than they give you unless they offer more; do not eat more than 2 biscuits when visiting other people.” My friend however suggested we go ask her mother for more and I declined at first. However, I have never been good at saying no, so she soon convinced me to go. Walking into the sitting room where our parents were talking, to my horror, she said. “Mom, Lizette asked if we could have more.”

Of course, my mom was shocked as that is very out of character for me and I never trusted this girl again, rightfully so as she turned out to be the biggest culprit during my days of being bullied. Of course I told my mom the truth and she believed me. I never needed to lie to my mother, as she was a trustworthy influence in my life – I could tell her anything and know that she would stand by me and that my secrets were safe with her. What an honour to have a mother like her.